Tag Archives: Children

The Golden Rule

“Do unto others as you would want them to do unto you.” -Confucius

I work heavily in a customer service relations environment. And a, as you all know already, I am a mommy. I work from home for a company where our main focus is researching and responding to complaints. I live by Confucius’ quote and it pays off.

As parents we have to lead by example. If not, then we get rebellious misunderstanding children. “Well you say this but do that… so why can’t I?” I know this is the outcome because it was the exact way I was as a child. (Many regrets now due to my rebellious days, but that is neither here nor there.)

Almost everyone I come into contact with on the phone compliments me on how patient I am and how well I listen. I had one lady tell me today that she wished everyone she had to interact with had my attitude and patience. In a job where all you hear are complaints, its super nice to get a compliment in the midst of their anger. I try to relay these instances to my children as best I can. In every situation I am in, I think to myself, “If I were on the other end of this, how would I want to be treated and talked to?” That’s all I want my kids to remember in their day to day lives. Before you react, think it through. Many adults need to learn this as well. (It took me a while, but I finally trained my brain to immediately go to that thought whenever I feel myself getting frustrated in the slightest.) It is also a good way to deescalate almost all situations which, in the long run, benefits you because you are less stressed and spent even less time getting to the solution of the problem by skipping all the arguing and drama.

So the next time you feel yourself getting heated or agitated, take a step back and breathe. Ask yourself, if I were them (kids, boss, customers, mom, dad, wife, etc.) and that had happened to me how would I feel and how would I want my feelings to be handled? When you arrive at an answer, start back in on the conversation and get to a solution. Remind your kids to try this as well. It’s a good way to remind ourselves that others feelings matter just as much as our own.

Middle School Mistakes

This will be more of a rant post…. Kids will be kids. They will say and do some of the stupidest things when they are highly emotional, or upset. They are still learning out to let their emotions out in an acceptable way. They are still learning how to deal with major emotions when they do bubble to the surface… So when they make a mistake, we (the parents/teacher/principal/etc) are supposed to step in and give them corrective criticism and let them know, “Hey, that wasn’t the best way to handle that situation. Here is what should have been done. Here are the consequences of your actions.”

But that isn’t always the case. Some schools will involve the police and go as far as pressing charges ON A 6TH GRADER for something that was blurted out, stupidly, during a moment of anger. Why are we ruining these children’s lives over an emotion filled outburst? I can’t give much detail (to protect all parties involved—also the child in question isn’t my own.)The threat was serious enough to be punished by suspension. Or even expulsion. I do not believe criminal charges should have been a consequence of mere words. Now this child will be viewed as a criminal for the rest of his life because of something on his record. And half the people doing the judging wont even ask him the backstory, they will just see it or hear about it and form their own opinions of him. How fair is that?

In the world we live in today, you have to worry about your kids growing up too fast. You have to worry about what they will be exposed to via social media. You have to worry about your daughters being disrespected by boys. And you have to worry about your boys being falsely accused of being a boy that didn’t respect a girls boundaries. And, you have to worry about a school pressing charges on your child for saying the wrong thing out of anger, instead of simply correcting their behavior and giving them a punishment that is more fitting for their age group.

Why are we making criminals of 6th graders? They shouldn’t have a criminal record for a simple verbal mistake. We have to do better for our kids. We have to mold and shape them and stop taking the simple way out as parents/guardians/school officials. Pressing charges isn’t always the way to go. I would hate to catch a charge every time I, as an adult, say something to or about someone out of anger. I would never get out of prison. We have to do better. We need to make common sense common again.

When your kids just can’t find the words…

I think one of my favorite things when my kids were first learning to talk were all the mispronounced words that came out of their mouths. Some were hilarious and totally inappropriate (not on purpose of course.) Others were just completely adorable!!!!

My daughter would say “Mom, I need shit and bitches.” At first I was completely taken off guard. She was my first child, and I didn’t know where she had heard those terms, or why she would repeat them. I was unsure how to respond and react. So, after a couple of moments of being dumb-founded, I just said, “Show me baby.” She walked and stumbled to her dresser and pointed. My child was asking for a SHIRT and BRITCHES. She simply wanted to change. After getting to the bottom of that, it was hilarious and imperative that I immediately stop calling pants “britches” and work with her on the pronunciation of shirt. LOL!

For my daughter, a pop tart was a “Jelly Parp.” However, with my son, he couldn’t say “marshmallow” so those were called “Mishellellows.” Hippopotamus was a “Hippopomanus” and Walrus was “Rawlrus.”

Kids are the best. They make you laugh without meaning to, even on the bad days, when you don’t think anything could cheer you up. I would love to hear some of your funny pronunciation stories that your kids have! Please share them below in the comment section!!

Public Potties

So we were recently on a long road trip and we stopped at a truck stop for a potty break. Me and my daughters enter the woman’s restroom and there is a mom looking at me apologetic standing in front of a stall door. I am wondering why she is looking at me with that expression, when finally the door opens and her son comes out of the stall. He was maybe 7 or 8 years old. She looks at me as my daughter is entering the stall and says, “I don’t trust him to go into the mens room just yet. Is that bad?”

I gave her the best and most honest answer I had. Which was, “People are crazy and I don’t blame you one bit. I didn’t let my son start going to the mens room alone until he was about 10.” Yes I got looks from time to time, but who cares? If you want to fault a mother that is protecting her children to the best of her capabilities something is wrong with you. Not the mom.

I think today we worry so much about offending others that it just stresses us out to the max. If I am traveling on a long road trip, and I am in a state where I know no one, I’m just passing through… You are damn straight I will not be sending my small children into the bathroom alone. If that bothers you, that’s your problem. Not mine. I will leave that restroom with a smile on my face knowing I did what I felt best for my child with no further thoughts about you and how you looked at me in the process.

So, to the apologetic mom in the truck stop restroom that was questioning herself, Keep momming!! You’re doing a fabulous job, don’t second guess your self!!! You have got this mama!